Look at the whole board

While I'm on the dream kick, I have to share this clip.  I've been watching The West Wing on Netflix and loooooooooving every minute of it.  I shed a few tears when I watched this the other night.  Background: the older guy is the President; the younger guy is part of the senior staff.  The President was given a few chess sets from a Prime Minister.  He gives Sam a chess set and they've been playing off and on all day.  The President has let Sam on the inside on an issue.

Dream BIG

We had a "dreaming session" last week in our small group -- to dream for the new year and beyond.  Was really good and thought I'd share.

Intro/follow up to what we'd discussed previously:

• Vulnerability (along with community) is a non-negotiable with Jesus.
• Why do we avoid being vulnerable? 
• Why is vulnerability worth it?
• How does this affect your relationship with Jesus?
• Vulnerability is scary but even when you get hurt, you can take it to the Lord.
• Will you let disappointments/frustrations/circumstances affect how you see God?
• Hardship can make God seem really small.  

HOPE SHINES BRIGHT IN THE FACE OF ADVERSITY.

Read the introduction to Jesus Today.

Found a short synopsis of that here: http://jmcgrathart.blogspot.com/2012/11/just-read-this-article-about-gal-who.html.

• Painful process leads us to healing.
• Where is your hope?
• Where is your dream?
• Are you afraid to verbalize your dream?
• When you're hurt out of vulnerability and lose hope because of circumstances, you get away from the calling God has on your life.
• Moses had a calling.  He got side tracked.  But in the end, God worked it out.
• We have to take steps, but God does the Work.

A lot of this came from the book, The Dream Giver; I just finished reading it last night.  

Rennie asked us these questions:

1. WHAT IS YOUR DREAM?
   Questions to help you figure this out:
   What did you want to be when you grew up?  Who do you admire most?  What do you love to do the most?  Who do you love the most?  What do you feel the most called to do?  When do you feel the most fulfilled?  If money wasn't an issue, what would you do?
2. WHAT ARE THE THINGS GETTING IN THE WAY OF YOUR DREAMS?
   Is it money, fear, getting out of your comfort zone, playing it safe, feel unqualified, feel alone, etc?
3. IF FEAR WAS A PART OF YOUR REASONS, WHAT YOU THINK ARE YOUR LIMITS ARE OFTEN JUST THE STARTING POINTS.
4. WHO ARE THE BULLIES TO YOUR DREAM?
5. WHO ARE YOUR LIFE-GIVERS/SUPPORTERS?
6. WHO HELPS YOU PURSUE YOUR DREAM?
   Who will really walk beside you and help make this dream become a reality?
7. THINK ABOUT YOUR JOURNEY SO FAR...HAS IT FELT LENGTHY?
   When you're in the desert, what are you learning?  What have you learned?  
8. ARE YOU WILLING TO SURRENDER YOUR DREAM BACK TO GOD?
   Sometimes we take what the Lord gives us and morph it into something else, something we want/think we want.
   Red flags to that: seems selfish, builds your reputation and dishonors God, gets corrupted, etc.
   Root of an un-surrendered dream: you don't believe God will give you good things or you don't believe He'll make your dream come true.  Therefore, you hold on tightly to something -- accepting something smaller than what the Lord has in store for you.

For me, it was really good to think through these things and jot them down. Hope it will be for you, too!

Freedom to reveal

Jenn sent this quote to me the other day and I LOVE it:

On the cross in the final moments of his suffering Jesus asked my god my god why have you forsaken.me? In that one brief moment Jesus gave all of humankind permission to question god on the difficult moments of life. How powerful and freeing it is to know that we can reveal our deepest struggles to our god without fear?

Dip and spreader anyone?

I love the way the Lord works.  I was given a gift yesterday, pictured below:

These things aren't so much my style, but the giver of this gift told me I could get rid of it in a year.  Ha!  However, this was my word for the year: HOPE.  And so it sits proudly in my office...a reminder of things to come.

A new year, a new hope?

Happy New Year!

I haven't felt like writing much over the past few months.  Clearly.  And, I'm not sure how much I feel like writing today, rather than feeling drawn to work out some of the thoughts roaming in this head of mine...

I won't lie to you internet, 2012 was a rough year.  Suffice it to say, I shed more tears last year than in any other year to date.  Don't get me wrong, my life is not that terrible.  But, when it's your head and heart that ache and groan over things that are and the things that are not, it matters a lot to you...and it is hard.

AND, there were some really great and really fun things about the year that I won't forget because they have left lasting imprints on my heart, and hopefully my life.  But overall, it was a hard year, especially emotionally.  Out of the hurt and darkness came some really good time with the Lord.  I have definitely learned a lot about the presence of the Lord and what it means to meet him there.

I was very ready to put 2012 behind me and hopeful for what 2013 would bring - it had to be better than what I'd been wading through the months.  There was something in particular I'd hoped to resolve before the clock struck twelve.  It seemed possible to do so, but ended up not happening.  And the first week of this new year has brought a few more disappointments.  One bigger than the others, but when you're already tender, things that would normally be brushed off feel more like a boulders you have to shove up a hill.

Wow.  Is this the most uplifting thing you've ever read, or what?  But, I'm better at being honest that blowing sunshine.  Alas, I want things to be different, to be better - in my heart if not my circumstances.

I picked Isaiah 43:19 to be my verse for 2013.  "Behold, I am doing a NEW thing; now it springs forth, do you not perceive it?  I will make a way in the wilderness and rivers in the desert."

Don't you just love it?  Aren't you desperate for it to be true?  I am.